ODSP

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ODSP

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Hrm. This program sounds kind of familiar.

TRANSCRIPT:

Cell 01

CAPTION: After School…

Principle:
Now, Rhett, Mr. Harlem tells me you had some…ahem…choice…words regarding F.A.T.S?

Cell 02

Harlem:
Tell’um that mumbo jumbo you’ve been spewing all afternoon.

Rhett:
Converting physical labour into fetishized commodity is against the rules of nature.

Cell 03

Principle:
I think I understand what’s going on; you’re just worried you won’t be able to participate on account of your afflictions.

Rhett:
Afflictions? No, it’s Marxism.

Cell 04

Principle:
Right, Marxism. Well you don’t need to worry son, we won’t let your Marxism get in the way of you earning some F.A.T.S. It just so happens I have a great idea.

Cell 05

Principle:
Any student who can’t earn F.A.T.S because of their “problems” will be put in a program that awards them some F.A.T.S every month—not as much as the people working really hard, of course, but just enough to get by.

Cell 06

Harlem:
That’s a terrible idea, ripe for abuse. People who aren’t disabled will try and get on and the disabled will just find ways to con the system.

Cell 07

Principle:
We’ll just have a rigorous screening process that goes into exorbitant, humiliating, detail about medical history and such. You know, just pages and pages of forms and paper work to prove you’re of an arbitrarily decided qualifying disability. Of course, they’ll also need to continually prove their disablement…just in case they get cured or something.

Cell 08

Principle:
And we’ll make them report their income—I’m sure they won’t mind giving us complete oversight and rigorous controls over their finances. And if they go over the monthly limit, even by just 5 tokens, we’ll just clawed back their monthly allocation and repeat offenders will get kicked off. That way no one can get rich off the program.

Cell 09

Principle:
And we shall call this service “Obviously Disabled Special Points,” ODSP for short.

Rhett:
I think you may have misunderstood my concerns…